Wow, what a thread this has turned out to be. I can't understand the problem at all. In our relationship everything we do is consenual and that goes both ways.. I have had numerous hairjobs from my wife who has bottom of ass long, brown hair. I have asked and been given the OK to cum in her hair - especially when she's going to take a shower anyway.
This is usually at the end of our lovemaking, after enjoying each other as we want or desire. When she wants anything specific we go for it.. with great enthusiasm. Example: she really likes me to use a vibrator on her until she's a mass of jelly...and I love doing it, watching her face, feeling her body when she cums....I also love having my cock in her warm, soft mouth but do not cum because she does not enjoy the strong taste of my sperm.
Humiliation is present if one partner forces his desires on the other in anything but a consensual manner or in role playing where it can be a turn-on. That then can be deemed humilating or even degarding. Not happening in our loving relationship!
Stu