Hi Anya,
The main thing above all else is that you are alive and well! You seem like a smart lady (I do not know you personally) and as such you'll figure out your next steps. Just give it time. Maybe even lots of time
That's 1. And if I may (and the overly aggressive mods on this matter permit it):
2. So glad to hear that you haven't cut your hair, however and as you said, it's your choice. Make yourself happy, especially at this time. Whatever the length of your hair, you are still the same person inside.
3. That's a relief!
4. I would consider offering your long and faithful members something more than a cancellation notice as you mentioned that you plan on keeping your site open for now.
6. Sorry to hear the news about you and Jim. And yet as you seem to already know, it's for the better. Look forward, not back. Use your life lessons to take you to and propel you to where you want to be.
Good luck to you and I wish you the best.
NOTE TO MODS
It seems to me that since the board is set up in this manner, you are encouraging faux posters to say whatever and pretend to be whomever and then seemingly arbitrarily impose some form of censorship when posters want to have an honest discussion about something or someone that they care about, in this case Anya. She has been (and may still be) integral to the long hair community, and yet all prior discussion about her was wiped out as if nothing was happening. Somehow that just ain't right.
@ninja, I know you for quite a long time, back to the ntc days that Anya mentioned, and perhaps this is finally a good time to reconsider having folks properly register here as is done pretty much everywhere else.